


we took the victoria line to heartbreak

by swimnayeon



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: ANGST!!, F/F, and sana's also very tall, and she has freckles idk it was a cute touch, british!sahyo, i've exaggerated jihyo's height so in this she's very short, jihyo's korean from putney, sana's japanese from oxford circus, starts off with sana angst then goes into jihyo angst lol sorry, there's a term you might not get if you aren't british so google it, wbk it's what i do best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-20 22:59:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17631368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swimnayeon/pseuds/swimnayeon
Summary: sana and jihyo meet on a tube one night and somehow end up depressed and famous.





	1. the part where they meet on the tube

**Author's Note:**

> you might wanna get google translate out for this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "stop running from something that isn't chasing you"

“who are you running from?”

jihyo doesn’t know why she questioned the stranger on the tube, or why she couldn’t take her eyes off her.  
maybe it was because how often do you see someone panting like they’re trying to escape death after crashing through the tube doors at the last second, tears evident but no longer falling on their cheeks, clothes certainly not suitable for winter in london? you gotta take your chance to get some context, or maybe it was because underneath the messiness of her appearance, this girl was quite beautiful.  
by quite i mean jihyo almost proposed on the spot.

but tiny little elf hyo was barely up to this girls shoulder and nowhere near as breathtaking.  
however albeit short, park jihyo is one hell of a talker.

“someone”  
“does this someone have a name?”

the girl took one heaving breath, narrowing her eyes at jihyo before leaning back against the seat.

“well?”  
“someone.”

jihyo noticed an accent.  
it wasn’t too heavy, but she’d grown up with a recluse best friend who danced ballet from osaka bay for too many years to not know a japanese twinge when she heard one.

“あ、日本から来たの?”  
tall girl lifted her head back up, staring suspiciously at jihyo.  
she looked to be interested, though.

“どうやって知ったの?”

with a chuckle jihyo took her hands out of her pockets and rested her elbows on her knees and her head on her hands, yet despite her whole ‘pride of asia’ thing, she was wary of the stares of a few passengers, none of which seemed to be too welcoming.

“alas, one must never forget the way an accent sounds when it hits so close to home”

she tapped the side of her head twice and giggled again.

“where’d you learn japanese? are you from there too?”

  
“nah, i was raised in korea, but i had a close friend who came from osaka, had an accent similar to yours when she started learning english, and she liked to teach me when we were bored”

“she still back there?”

  
jihyo bit into her lip, eyes casting downwards for a split second.  
she nodded.

seems like tall girl wanted to change the subject.

“you sound posh, where are you living?”

jihyo sniffed and came back to herself, smiling slightly.

“me? posh? christ, i didn’t live in putney for six years to be called posh, you know”

now the other girl laughed quietly, a sound jihyo never knew she needed to hear but was so thankful that she did, because that shit was _melodic_.

_marry me_

she thought.  
over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and ov

“you’re staring at me.”

jihyo ignored both the comment and the blush creeping up her neck to her cheeks.  
she just prayed that it would be ignored, since the cold made everyone go red nowadays.

“what about you? you don’t sound like you’ve been here too long. when’d’ya move?”

the air around them both seemed to get hotter, matter of fact tall girl seemed to get hotter with every passing second.

“five years ago. from osaka straight to oxford circus.”

jihyos eyes nearly burst out of her head at that.

“oxford bloody circus?! fuckin ‘ell man are you loaded or something??”

“chill, my parents bought the house years before i was born and let me use it while i live here”

“wait you moved here alone?”  
she nodded, pressing her lips together and tensing her shoulders slightly.

“all by myself, not a word of english, just to study,”

her laugh comes back to bless jihyo's ears again, maybe this time it was a little less happy and more so forced, but honestly she can’t get enough of it.  
jihyo was already hooked, and she didn’t care if the addiction drove her crazy, but she just had to know more about this girl.

“sometimes i think asian parents care more about a kids grades than what they want”

there was sadness in her voice and her eyes dropped to her hands, which jihyo now clocked were filthy.  
matter of fact all of her was filthy.  
her clothes were stained, her skin was dull and patterned with dirt, her nails were long and unkempt with black grunge underneath them.  
how could a girl rich enough to live alone in oxford circus look like this?

“yeah”

there was a short silence where the last of the passengers in their carriage got off.  
it was only jihyo and this stranger who were going further.

“are you lying to me?”

it was so sudden even jihyo hadn’t expected herself to say it, but it was a necessary piece of information.  
she really was beginning to doubt the honesty of what this girl was saying.

“hm?”  
“mate you look like you live on james turner, oxford circus my ass”

something about the look on tall girl’s face really made jihyo regret those words. she stared at jihyo with huge, watery eyes and gulped, her mouth opening slightly and a trembling breath escaping from it.  
sure jihyo may have been whipped for a complete stranger but at the end of the day that was really all she was, all she’d probably ever be, and she probably had secrets and issues and a past that jihyo would never get to understand because her stop was soon and she really did have to go.  
yet a small part of jihyo wanted to stay.  
wanted to stay and find out more, stay and understand why this absolute angel was running like the clappers onto a victoria line tube looking fresh out of benefits street and dressed like it’s mid july in borneo.  
but it wasn’t her right to do so.  
if tall beautiful tube girl didn’t want to share, then who was jihyo to make her?

“i’m, uh, sorry, that was a bit much”

_great, park, you’ve ruined it now_

“i’m running from myself, by the way”

_oh?_

the hurt in her voice made jihyo want to cry.  
she sounded so scarred, so traumatised beyond her years, and jihyo suddenly couldn’t care less about what it was about or why she was doing it or for any more context, she just wanted to lean over and give this girl the worlds biggest hug and tell her everything’s going to be okay.

_fuck it_

jihyo touched her for the very first time, enveloping her lithe body in a hug cushioned by her huge white coat.  
this girl, despite what she looked like, smelled of vanilla and forgotten dreams, and jihyo couldn’t get enough.

“it gets better”

at first the girl tensed up, refused the touch, was at a loss for what to do, but then jihyo felt a grip like a kitten's paw on her jacket, and saw her clinging on whilst light sobs jolted her body.

“i don’t know who you are, what your story is, or where you’ll end up, but i know a day will come when you stop running, when you take a breather and realise that you’re the only one in the race, and there’s no point in going faster and faster and faster when you’ll only end up alone and asthmatic,”

jihyo drew away to take in the girl beside her.  
her eyes swallowed every detail; from the freckles littering chubby cheeks right down to her mile long legs and jihyo memorised it all.

they saw the tears in each others eyes and both paused to wipe them away, some forced chuckles and tired smiles put on to try and stop it from hurting as much.

“stop running from something that isn’t chasing you, it’s pointless, is all i’m saying”

“stop running from something that isn’t chasing you…”

she repeated the phrase with such awe that jihyo melted that little bit more.  
“can i tell you something, stranger?”

jihyo nodded, knowing that if she spoke her voice would’ve cracked like some sort of prepubescent goose.  
_god_ would that have ruined the moment.

“i’m saying the complete truth and nothing but. i am from osaka, i did move to oxford circus five years ago, and i still live there to this day, only 9/10 times it’d be useless trying to find me there. i’m only so gross and disgusting because i run away a lot. my family house is just filled with memories and vibes and ghosts of the past and honestly? i can’t stand it. i can barely stay there for more than a day or two before i feel like ripping my own hair out and i’ve tried, believe me, to convince my parents to let me move into student housing because maybe then i can get away from it all without actually having to get away”

she stopped for a second when her voice trailed off. jihyo was afraid she’d cry, and then the waterworks for the small girl would set off.  
but lucky for the both of them it was just for her to recollect her thoughts.  
she sighed and turned to face jihyo, leaning against the back of her chair.

“i go to uni but that’s not long before i have to go back to that place. believe you me, stranger girl, i don’t want to run away every day just because i can feel all the bad thoughts and remember all the bad things pouring from the walls, i’d rather be comfy in bed with a book and some tea, but today’s my second day of wandering and i slept in a bush last night. this is a necessity so i don’t off myself with a shoelace or something stupid and i don’t know what to do anym-”

“this is my stop.”

jihyo couldn’t bear to hear someone who seemed so undeserving go through so much pain like this, because since a young age jihyo’s had trouble distinguishing other people’s suffering from her own.  
it’s a horrible thing to live with.  
she had to go through every breakup alongside her friends and mourn everyone lost even if she never knew them and feel the cuffs weighing down her hands at every false arrest of a wrongly accused innocent.  
in other words, she panicked and didn’t know what to do.

“hm?”  
“i’m sorry, i just-”

what real point was there in explaining?

it got too much for jihyo, that was all.  
she was ready for it in the beginning but then it all came crashing down on her.  
the tube pulled up to the station.  
and honestly? jihyo fell to pieces.

“my name’s park jihyo, although i live in putney right now i’m going out to see some old friends in westminster, i’m from guri originally, i think i fell in love with you on the spot, but i know that it’s stupid because you’re just a stranger and if i’d have let you continue talking i’d have had a breakdown and missed my stop and i’m sorry if i came off rude it’s just that i-”

“you missed your stop.”

jihyos mouth fell into a small “o” shape as she realised that while she was talking, they had, in fact, closed the door.

“well now i just look stupid”

at least she _tried_ to lighten the mood.

“my name’s minatozaki sana, if you wanted to know.”

_sana_

it was such a beautiful name jihyo just kept wanting to hear it over and over and over again.

_sana_  
_sana_  
_sana_  
_sana_  
_sana_  
_sana_  
_sana_

“sana sana sana”  
“do you know you’re saying that aloud or…?”  
“i’m just making it worse for myself, aren’t i?”

sana smiled, patting the seat next to her.

“you fell in love with me on the spot?”

jihyo stayed standing.

“you’re beautiful. and interesting. i had no choice”

“can you stay with me, jihyo?”

“i can’t do that, it’ll put both of us through suffering neither of us deserve, plus i don’t know you any more than your name and where you’re from, sana, you can’t expect me to make such a big decision so quickly, you could be leading me on just to kill me. for all i know you’ve been tracking me for weeks and this is your final step.”

“then get to know me and i’ll prove i’m not”

It was a tempting offer.

“no”

“would you like me to admit that i fell in love with you too?”

“don’t lie to me for bait, i get attached too easily”

“then hang on tight”

“for a girl with so many problems you sure do have a hell of a way with words”

“so stay with me then?”

and it’s the way sanas eyes shifted from unreadable to suddenly like a picture book for children that did it for jihyo.  
it was so simple this whole time.  
sana didn’t need a new place to stay or to keep running away every night, she needed someone to distract her from it all, and who better than park jihyo, the stranger who was in love with her and the stranger she was in love with.  
what did either of them have to lose?

“be my escape?”

jihyo burst into tears.


	2. the part where depression kicks in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "didn't i tell you to fuck off?"

jihyo’s lost count of the nights of sleep she’s lost to the voices.

for now it seems like years since she’s felt that warmth that got her to dreamland in the blink of an eye, that warmth that enveloped her like some sort of blanket on nights where draughts crept under the door and condensation dripped down the windowsill because of course the girls couldn’t afford double glazing.

i suppose it was her own fault after all.

because jihyo was the one who’d gotten quieter and sat a little further away and dodged the handholds and the hugs and stopped going on spontaneous trips to morley’s at all hours of the night.  
all sana had done was sit and wonder what she’d done wrong.

but the thing is jihyo wishes she could just scream and yell and cry and look sana directly in the eye and stress that she’s _done_ nothing, and she never _could_ do anything to make jihyo hate her in any way it’s just that jihyo, you see, hates herself above all else.

jihyo hated herself for having those feelings so she distanced but now jihyo hates herself for ever deciding that was a good idea in the first place.

and now she’s lost.

lost count, we already know, but she’s also lost her way.

now she’s facing the dead end of sleep paralysis and suicidal thoughts all because she dwelled too much on the fact that for fuck’s sake she was in love with minatozaki sana.

 

\----------------

 

now jihyo's waiting.  
waiting for tzuyu to get out of her room so she can depression nap at two in the afternoon.

“fuck off and let me sleep”

tzuyu stands still.

“you're being stupid, you've been asleep half the day”

jihyo pulls down the blanket and pokes her eyes out, staring glumly at the younger girl.

“who's to say i can't sleep the rest”

her voice drips with sarcasm and she resolutely throws the covers back over her.  
now tzuyu doesn't know what to do.

“do you want me to go get sana?”

now of _course_ jihyo overreacts and makes it obvious by sitting bolt upright and licking her lips a couple hundred times before saying in such a certain tone

“no.”

“why not? i thought you guys were like the closest out of all of us”

“i doubt she'd want to see me”

‘ _like this_ ’ jihyo wants to add.  
‘ _i doubt she'd want to see me like this_ ’ because she knows sana wouldn't give a shit about the way jihyo's treated her, but it'd be the sight of jihyo back at square one that would repel the sensitive girl.  
all the memories of jihyo crying herself to sleep and sana feeling none but helpless at the sight, of stealing away to random company bathrooms to wash the blood off jihyo's arms or splash water onto her unconscious face.  
she knew all of it would send sana flying but she didn't say it out loud.  
because then tzuyu would know things she didn't need to know.

“why not? has something happened between you two?”

jihyo snaps out of it.

“didn’t i tell you to fuck off?”

 

\----------------

 

“have you even eaten? like, at all since the goodbye stage?”

tzuyu’s back again, only this time she’s straddling jihyo’s waist as she checks her temperature and wipes her fevered face and neck with a damp cloth.  
jihyo just stays still, like always.

“can’t be arsed”

“you need to be more responsible”

“you need to mind your own business, asswipe”

  
jihyo hisses, slapping tzuyu’s hand and in turn knocking the flannel out her hands.  
the younger girl tuts but doesn’t say anything.  
because tzuyu’s the only girl left in the group who isn’t completely repelled by the new jihyo.  
all the others have long since given up even attempting to speak to the blanket goblin that took their old hyo’s place.


	3. the part where they say goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i'll bring you back something nice"

“please, come back to me”

sana’s voice is barely above a whisper as her trembling fingers ghost the line of jihyo’s cheekbone.

it’s funny.

not funny ha ha but funny peculiar, funny as in how on earth did jihyo manage to separate from her old self this much in such a short amount of time.

no actually fuck that, this is fucking stupid.

but it’s irreversible.  
the hurt and the pain and the numbness of not only park jihyo but of minatozaki sana, are you _kidding_ me they can’t go back on it, not even if they wanted to.  
so whatever dumb idea jihyo’s about to commit to she’s doing it for the both of them.  
at least that’s what she likes to tell herself.

“i don’t wanna be yours anymore”

those words hit sana like a bullet and the one behind the trigger is in front of her.

how could jihyo say that?  
how, after so many years of being one and the same, could she possibly want to part from sana?

but that’s the thing, you see, she doesn’t.  
 _god_ it’s the last thing she’d ever want, and anyone within a thousand mile radius would know that.  
that’s their biggest flaw.  
sana thinks jihyo doesn’t love her and jihyo thinks she doesn’t deserve to be loved.  
especially not by someone as perfect as her underground girl.

“just let me go, for the sake of us both and for the sake of those girls in there, let me go”

  
sana goes to speak, but instead jihyo begins fumbling around in her bag, clumsy and dropping things from lack of coordination at the stupidity of this whole situation.

then, she pulls out a keychain.

“i stole this from nayeon. give it back to her and let them know i'm going away for a while”

sana takes the plastic eiffel tower in trembling hands.

“you're leaving us?”

silence.

“you're leaving _me_?”

almost angry with how much sana just doesn't understand, jihyo manages to look her right in the eyes.

not to say she's not on her tippy toes, though.

“you deserve a life without me in it. all of you do, in fact i think i do too.”

suddenly years of seeing each other at their most painful moments compares to now like an elephant to a mouse.

neither jihyo nor sana have felt damaged to this extent ever in their lives.  
maybe jihyo shouldn't go.  
she deliberates for little more than a second, but her mind is made.

_these girls deserve better_

“maybe we'll cross paths someday, as jihyo and sana or as entirely different people. maybe i'll be back in time to see you guys make it big, maybe i'll be long gone when it all goes down the drain. who knows, i could get back and half of you will be dead-”

“don't say things like that.”

“sorry.”

in the silence both girls soften.  
it's true, they love each other, they always have and always will, but why does jihyo have a hunch that the best thing for the both of them is sadly not each other?

maybe that's just how life works.

“thanks for everything, tozaki, i don't know where i would've been had i not met you on that tube years ago.”

“i'll see you again, won't i?”

jihyo smiles weakly, because if not that then she'd burst into tears.

“we'll meet again, runaway, i'm sure of it.”

she really isn't though, but she'd like to believe in hope for once.

“who knows, maybe we'll pick up where we started sometime”

sana hates tubes, now, and she's never had the heart to say it because jihyo was always a sentimental fucker who claimed it was where she met her soulmate.  
 _soulmate_.  
soulmates didn't leave each other, right?

well apparently this one does.

who cares, anyway, it's too late for sana to fight it.

“stay safe, midget”

“i'll bring you back something nice, beanstalk”

and with that, park jihyo disappeared.

 

 


End file.
